Thursday, June 4, 2009

Sassy Pants

Mr. X is getting sassy with me of late, and I am not pleased at all. To wit, we had this conversation last night.

Me: What happened to you replenishing my iced tea when I run out? It's been three days!
Mr. X: Oh really? I thought it had only been a day and a half.
Me: It sounds like you're criticizing me, Mr. X.
Mr. X: No, I'm just pointing out that you're exaggerating.
Me: Make some iced tea (I was gritting my teeth while I said this).
Mr. X: Yup.
Me: And that's another thing--didn't I tell you to call me Miss X?
Mr. X: Yup.
Me: Don't you mean "Yes, Miss X?"
Mr. X: *gusty sigh and major sarcastic tone* YES, Miss X.

And then...oh, you'll never guess what the little shit did to me then. Do you know what he did while he sarcastically obeyed me in a less than sincere and devoted way?

HE. ROLLED. HIS. EYES.

What should I do to my bratty husband who is behaving like a spoiled teenager?

I did what any good parent does to a bratty child. I ignored him.

**********

This has been the tone of our relationship for a bit now. Mr. X wanted to put our overt displays of my dominance on hold while a relative visited, and I agreed, because I am not insensitive to the position this "alternative lifestyle" puts Mr. X in.

However. Having met this close relative and his wife, I can safely say that nobody would have been shocked if Mr. X had "come out", so to speak. The men in his family tend to prefer their women a little on the....let's say "leadership oriented" track.

Regardless, I allowed him this courtesy. The houseguests left last week, and Mr. X has been all talk and no action since. He has been snotty and impossible to deal with. He has failed to obey me on any number of occasions, and has been downright inconsiderate to my face. I woudln't tolerate this in a "typical" relationship and I'll be damned if I'll deal well with it if I'm leading things. I think a retraining of sorts is in order, and I'm planning as we speak.

Because there are consequences for rolling your eyes at Miss X. And for not having iced tea when she wants it.

Golly. I think I just finished off another pitcher. Good thing it's bedtime...

You've been warned, Cowboy.

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